Brats: Our Journey Home
(Interview includes updates on Donna's recent Brats projects)
Donna Musil
Donna was raised an Army brat and has lived and worked in Germany, Korea, Ireland, Copenhagen, San Francisco, Los Angeles, Washington, DC, Georgia, North Carolina, Virginia, Kentucky, and Paris. As a child, she moved 12 times in 16 years. Her father was a JAG officer and military judge. When she was 16, her father died, and two weeks later, her family moved to Columbus, Georgia, where she finished high school.
For the next 20 years, Donna moved 19 times, graduated college, and worked in a variety of jobs, but always felt "different" from her fellow Americans. In 1997, she learned that she was not alone. While surfing the Internet, Donna discovered a Web site for her Taegu, Korea high school. A few weeks later, she attended an impromptu reunion in Washington, DC. It was revelatory. For the first time, Donna felt like she "belonged" somewhere, and thus began her journey "home."
Expat Women's Interview with Donna
ExpatWomen: Donna, I finally understand why your film Brats: Our Journey Home received so much praise when it was first released in 2006 and why it took you seven years to make... it is brilliant. Well done. For those who have not seen the film, can you please share an overview of what the film is about and what types of themes are covered in the film?
Donna: Thanks, Andrea... although I cannot take all the credit. A lot of folks made BRATS a reality – not the least of who are the interviewees in the film who had the courage and ability to talk about their experiences. BRATS is the first feature-length documentary about growing up in a military family, and the profound effect it has on one's entire life. It is narrated by Air Force Brat Kris Kristofferson, and features brats of all ages and branches of service, including Army Brat General Norman Schwarzkopf. The film resonates with other "third culture kids" too, like Foreign Service, NGO, and missionary kids who moved around the world as children, as well as military brats of other countries.
We cover many aspects of growing up "brat" in the film, including moving, living overseas, growing up in an authoritarian, patriarchal environment, reintegrating into one's "home" culture, etc. But BRATS is essentially a film about belonging, or not belonging, as the case may be. I knew on a cerebral level that I was raised an "Army brat," but I did not know that had anything to do with my adult life until I reconnected with my childhood friends and discovered Mary Edwards Wertsch's book, Military Brats: Legacies of Childhood Inside the Fortress. These two events set me on a journey of self-discovery that changed my life.
Seven years and 500 interviews later, I finally know who I am and where I am "from" – a wonderful, borderless group of vagabonds who see the world through a different set of eyes than most rooted people, including many of our own parents. That is another major theme of the BRATS film – the struggle to find and define oneself after growing up in an environment where children's needs and desires are typically last on the totem pole – far behind the Military Mission or God or Country or even the Corporation. Stephanie Donaldson Pressman's brilliant book, The Narcissistic Family, helped me isolate the particular strengths and weaknesses this type of upbringing bestows, and how to thrive, not just survive, as an adult "brat" or "TCK." |
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ExpatWomen: Donna, not all military brats live overseas, but most do at some point. What is the typical life/relocation plan for military brats, and why did so many interviewees in the film have trouble answering the question "Where are you from?"? |
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Donna: The average military brat moves nine to twelve times before he or she graduates from high school. This number is supposedly decreasing, but brats still move a lot. It is rare for a brat to attend just one high school. I went to three high schools in three years. Where brats move depends on a variety of factors, including their branch of service, the current political climate and the military member's rank. After World War II, thousands of military brats moved to Europe and Japan. In the future, there will be more brats in Asia and less in Europe. Some brats just travel from one side of the U.S. to the other. But they all have trouble answering the question, "Where are you from?" because "home" for brats is not a place, a piece of real estate. It is not even a generic military base. Unless brats join the military themselves, they cannot go back on a base after they graduate – not without an invitation, anyway. Even if they did, as Mary Wertsch points out, no one would know them.
For brats, "home" is more a state of mind, a set of common experiences, a way of looking at the world. The particular places one lived do not even seem to matter. It is as if the whole experience is greater than the sum of its parts. But no one tells us this as we are growing up. Brats feel different but they do not understand why, so quite naturally they assume it must be "them" – they are not "normal." The reality is, they are very normal – they are just like all the other brats who grew up like they did.
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ExpatWomen: In Brats, your film's narrator, Kris Kristofferson, said "my childhood has shaped me in ways I'm only beginning to understand". What effects does this have on the psyche of military brats/TCKs? |
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Donna: I believe growing up "brat" or "TCK" has a profound and long-lasting effect on one's psyche – in both positive and some not-so-positive ways. Personally, I am glad I was raised a brat. The good far outweighed the bad – for me – but that is not the case for everyone, and it does not mean we should not try to ameliorate some of the stresses this kind of life bestows just because some of us survived (or learned to manage) those stresses.
I think moving has had the most impact on my psyche. On the positive side, I think it has given me a sense of curiosity, a fascination with the world. I am not afraid of "different." I am not afraid of change. I like learning new things. I am comfortable with varied points of view. Like General Schwarzkopf, I realized somewhere along the way that there is more than one right way to do something, there is more than one right way to "be."
I also know what it feels like to be an outsider. I remember being the only white girl in a sea of Asian children staring at me and touching my blonde hair. I did not like it at the time, but it has made me a better person. I have a sense of empathy I might not have had otherwise. I truly believe if every human being had to spend at least one year of their childhood in a different country, the world would be a much happier place. If I could talk Bill Gates, George Soros and Warren Buffett into financing one thing – that would be it.
On the other hand, the skills I learned to survive a life of constant change have not always made me the best girlfriend. Walking away is much easier for me than working things out. And trust and intimacy are tricky things. It took a long time for me to realize I do need other people... that friends are not interchangeable. |
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ExpatWomen: Since Brats, you have been busy working on a number of other research projects and you have set up a mentor program. Tell us more. |
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Donna: My primary BRATS-related project right now is Operation Military Brat, an educational outreach program designed to raise the awareness of military "brats": to acknowledge their existence, sacrifices and contributions; to improve the quality of their lives; and to foster the self-awareness and sense of belonging necessary to employ the more positive aspects of their unique multi-cultural inheritance. Basically, we are trying to focus some attention on the children as individuals in their own right, not just as appendages to their parents. We are trying to get the BRATS film into the hands of people who need it – adult brats, brats about to graduate, brat counselors and parents. We have put together a collection of books and films that celebrate and explore the life of a brat and will begin donating these "Military BRATS Libraries" to various schools and libraries that serve brats.
We have also started the so brats can connect with each other and share their stories.
In terms of research projects, one of the current research projects we are conducting is exploring how growing up on integrated military bases twenty years before the civil rights movement has affected American military brats. Another study examines whether "growing up brat" causes or predisposes brats to post-traumatic stress disorder. A third looks at the rates of teenage sexual abuse on military bases. Finally, we would like to explore why higher percentages of brats and TCKs attend college than rooted civilians, even when their parents did not. If you would like to participate in any of these studies, please visit the section of our website. |
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ExpatWomen: How can people help or donate to the important work you are doing for military brats? |
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Donna:
There are a number of ways people can support Brats Without Borders. The most obvious way is to and/or . We are a 501(c)(3) non-profit, so all donations are tax-deductible (but purchases are not). There are a variety of in-kind donations we need, as well – office equipment and services, advertising space, printing and web-design services, airline miles, etc. Spreading the word about BWB and the BRATS film is another way people can help. Have BRATS house parties! Form BRATS clubs! Talk to your family and friends. Participate in our research projects and future films. Brats and their parents have to be the biggest advocates of military brats and third-culture kids. |
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ExpatWomen: Donna, we applaud your passion for helping military brats and third culture kids. May your energy continue and we look forward to future films from Donna Musil! |
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| July 2009 |
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